Ew

There is this weird thing that happens to me that makes me write horribly. I use idiotic, complicated words and sentence structures and write things like “it would behoove so-and-so” or “something with which he might find himself blah blah blah.” You get the idea. I think it’s anxiety. 

If I could use these structures in a seamless way, it would be better. But I don’t, so the writing is clunky. I guess that’s why people “edit.” But further anxiety makes me edit and re-edit and re-edit until it’s still not very good, because I can’t get my head around how a normal, non-anxious person would hear it.

I think about 5% of the time, my writing flows in interesting, unforced ways. I’m still trying to figure out what substances I need to be on/how much sleep I need/what inspiration I need/what emotional pits I need to emerge from in order to get into this state.

The book The Midnight Disease addresses this issue somewhat, by the way. I recommend it. Oddly enough, there seems to be a rumor going ‘round that depression causes good writing/makes you more creative. Um….it doesn’t. Just wanted to clear that up.

  1. burndownthedisco said: from what little i know about writing, and what i’ve heard from “professionals”, you have to train yourself by writing every day, so it comes out “good” when you want it to, not just when you’re inspired or whatever. i think that makes sense.
  2. irunfrombears said: It’s sort of funny. I refreshed the dashboard after writing this long, pretentious post and I saw that both you AND Caitlin had written about anxiety w/r/t writing. I quickly deleted about 98% of what I had originally written.
  3. junk-pile posted this